Go back to school-
Get back your fees
When we were young and growing up
after having passed High school, the common refrain amongst friends in college
for anyone who had forgotten his manners and basic courtesy would be “hey go
back to school and get back your fees”, which implied that the faulting party
hadn’t learnt the lessons expected of him while in school and therefore should lay
claim for a refund of his fees.
Today, as I and my daughter stood
in line to board the shuttle bus which would take us to the venue hall of ‘The
Delhi Book fair 2014’ at Pragati Maidan,
New Delhi, I restrained myself from shouting out this advice to a few
youngsters and their parents, who had no qualms about breaking the queue. In
the humid heat we were standing to wait our turn to board the shuttle bus and
were at the top of the queue. As the bus arrived, it stopped somewhere at the
rear of the queue. Immediately the youngsters and their parents broke the queue
and made a dash for the doors to board the vehicle without concern for people
who stood before them and who by the same yard stick of courtesy and mannerisms
should have been allowed to board on first come first served basis. Their
parents did not also restrict the youngsters from breaking the unwritten rules
of human engagement.
My daughter reminded me of the
difference when we had recently gone to Hong Kong and found people patiently
queuing up to board the metro and the buses. In metro stations lines are drawn
indicating the way and the direction the queues should be formed which is
practically followed by all young or old, strong or weak. Not a single soul
stood outside the drawn lines and everyone boarded without commotion and in
uniformity. Contrast this to any Indian city and see the difference for
yourself. Why does this happen, should we all go back to school and claim our
fees? Haven’t we been taught in school basic courtesy and manners or are we
overlooking society’s needs in the quest for me-ism?
In India the basic refrain is
‘chalta hai’ (it’s OK). Be it at traffic intersections, queues in bus stops,
metros, buying tickets or even for school admissions, might is right. The
stronger ones push the weaker and meeker ones out of the queue and get their
work done. We try to find an excuse to break the queue. Women are also
offenders when they expect to be treated differently even where no such
courtesy is extended as a rule of law. So many times at railway stations
queues, you will find perfectly dressed and presentable young ones barging
their way forward with utter disregard to others in the queue. If they are
reprimanded they look apologetic, nevertheless hanging on to their positions.
Some people take the stand that “who cares for reprimands, when you are not
expected to meet the same people again. What do you lose even if someone
reprimands you as long as you can push your way through and succeed with your uncourteous
attempts”.
At traffic intersections, you
will notice motorists ignoring the stop line warnings on the road. Even if
someone is the first to brake when the light turns orange, he will slowly
wriggle up to a position that leaves the zebra crossing and the stop line
behind him. Others follow suit with utter disregard to the law and the painted
warnings which glare back at them. It all boils down to selfishness, and lack
of courtesy and manners taught at home. Even though we are taught the basics in
school, we need to practice them every day lest we forget them. It is widely
known that practice makes us perfect. We live in a highly materialistic world,
where everything is defined by our self-edifying nature, where we are measured
in terms of quantity and not quality, where we cater to our cravings
irrespective of the failings around us.
We chase dreams with the single
focus on me and mine. Everything that we aspire for and seek to achieve in any
form is always centred on this premise. Though we all live for ourselves
primarily, we need to respect fellow beings in our society and it is only
courteous that we allow our fellow human beings the luxury of affordability
where they deserve them. The luxury of them before us, where they are the first
movers, also teaching our young ones the same so that we allow fellow human
beings their rights without trampling upon them; extending basic courtesy,
displaying mannerism and clinging to lessons learnt in school. To fail in our
endeavour would mean demeaning our school, education, teachers and parents,
their values and efforts imparted over the years.
30th August 2014
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